当前位置:首页 >> 英语 >> how to live a healthy life 写作讲评 - 3

how to live a healthy life 写作讲评 - 3


Unit 3

A Healthy Life

写作讲评

?Suppose you are James. ?Write a letter to grandpa to tell that you decide to live a healthy life. ?Write a 120-word (or so) essa

y.

Writing

Dear grandpa, After reading your letter, I have made up my mind to quit smoking and lead a healthy life just like you live. I will follow three steps to live a healthy life. First, quit smoking.________________________ ... Trust me, grandpa! I’ll succeed! Best wishes! yours, James

Work Show

Dear grandpa, After reading your letter, I have made up my mind to quit smoking and lead a healthy life just like you live. I will follow three steps to live a healthy life. First, quit smoking. Quit smoking is tough for me. However, smoking is bad for health, I am determined to give it up. When I want to smoke a cigeratte, I should remind myself that I’m a non-smoker. Second, break bad habits. I have a classmate. He always plays computer games until mid-night. He falls behind with his lessons. My body, which becomes accustomed to having nicotine in it, so it is time to getting out of bad habits. Third, eat a balanced diet. Experts say there are three groups of food, energy-giving food, body-building food and protective food. Experts say a balanced diet is consist of these three kinds of food. Experts also say they can help us work and play all day. They can also make strong bones and muscles. Nevertheless, I like nothing but beef, fish. Although, it is difficult to eat vegetables, I will try. Trust me, grandpa! I’ll succeed! Best wishes! yours, James

How will you grade it(定档)? And why?

What makes a good essay? ASSESSMENT Is the article divided into parts?

Structure
Does each part have a topic sentence?

_________ _______ ____ _____ _____
Structure

Dear grandpa, After reading your letter, I have made up my mind to quit smoking and lead a healthy life just like you live. I will follow three steps to live a healthy life. First, quit smoking. Quit smoking is tough for me. However, smoking is bad for health, I am determined to give it up. When I want to smoke a cigeratte, I should remind myself that I’m a non-smoker. Second, break bad habits. I have a classmate. He always plays computer games until mid-night. He falls behind with his lessons. My body, which becomes accustomed to having nicotine in it, so it is time to getting out of bad habits. Third, eat a balanced diet. Experts say there are three groups of food, energy-giving food, body-building food and protective food. Experts say a balanced diet is consist of these three kinds of food. Experts also say they can help us work and play all day. They can also make strong bones and muscles. Nevertheless, I like nothing but beef, fish. Although, it is difficult to eat vegetables, I will try. Trust me, grandpa! I’ll succeed! Best wishes! yours, James

What makes a good essay?

Is it without mistake? (spelling, grammar)

Is there any advanced vocabulary(高级词汇)? Language Is there any good sentence pattern(句式)?
Does the writer use any linking word?

Mistakes

______ __ _________ ___ _____ _________ ___
① ②
④ ③

Dear grandpa, After reading your letter, I have made up my mind to quit smoking and lead a healthy life just like you live. I will follow three steps to live a healthy life. First, quit smoking. Quit smoking is tough for me. However, smoking is bad for health, I am determined to give it up. When I want to smoke a cigeratte, I should remind myself that I’m a non-smoker. Second, break bad habits. I have a classmate. He always plays computer games until mid-night. He falls behind with his lessons. My body, which becomes accustomed to having nicotine in it, so it is time to getting out of bad habits. Third, eat a balanced diet. Experts say there are three groups of food, energy-giving food, body-building food and protective food. Experts say a balanced diet is consist of these three kinds of food. Experts also say they can help us work and play all day. They can also make strong bones and muscles. Nevertheless, I like nothing but beef, fish. Although, it is difficult to eat vegetables, I will try. Trust me, grandpa! I’ll succeed! Best wishes! yours, James

Correct Mistakes

1.Quit smoking is tough for me. 2.However, smoking is bad for health, I am determined to give it up. 3.My body, which becomes accustomed to having nicotine in it, so it is time to getting out of bad habits. 4. So it is time to getting out of bad habits.

What makes a good essay? First, quit smoking is tough for me. quitting
Is it without mistake? (spelling, grammar)

_

Language

常见错误: 1.do作主语(v-ing /to do形式才能做 主语)

I certainly know being determined is the most important during the withdrawal symptoms. (林豆豆)

_____

What makes a good essay? However, smoking is bad for health, I am determined to give it up. and I’ll decide on a day to quit, make a list of and making all the benefits I will get from stopping smoking after reading the letter.
Is it without mistake? (spelling, grammar)

^ __ ^/

Language

常见错误: 2. 一个句子中,多个谓语之间无任何连 接词(用上连接词或非谓语形式)

What makes a good essay?

____________ __________
is not as fit as before;
常见错误: 3.只有从句,没有主句

My body, which becomes accustomed to having nicotine in it, so it is time to getting out of bad habits.

Is it without mistake? (spelling, grammar) Language

What makes a good essay? So it is time to getting out of bad habits. get
Is it without mistake? (spelling, grammar)
Language

___

常见错误: 4.固定结构搭配错误

What makes a good essay?

Is it without mistake? (spelling, grammar)

Language

Is there any advanced vocabulary(高级词汇)?
Is there any good sentence pattern(句式)? Does the writer use any linking word?

Advanced Vocabulary

Dear grandpa, ... I will follow three steps to live a healthy life. First, quit smoking. Quit smoking is tough for me. However, smoking is bad for health, I am determined to give it up. When I want to smoke a cigarette, I should remind myself that I’m a non-smoker. Second, break bad habits. I have a classmate. He always plays computer games until mid-night. He falls behind with his lessons. My body, which becomes accustomed to having nicotine in it, so it is time to getting out of bad habits. Third, eat a balanced diet. Experts say there are three groups of food, energy-giving food, body-building food and protective food. Experts say a balanced diet is consist of these three kinds of food. Experts also say they can help us work and play all day. They can also make strong bones and muscles. Nevertheless, I like nothing but beef, fish. Although, it is difficult to eat vegetables, I will try. Trust me, grandpa! I’ll succeed! Best wishes! yours, James

人靠衣装,文靠词装。 词汇的选择要灵活新颖,出奇制胜。 越往后学到的词汇,用的人越少,自然越有水平。

Dear grandpa, ...

smoking is bad for health, I am determined to give it up. When I want to smoke a cigarette, I should remind myself that I’m a non-smoker. Second, break bad habits. I have a classmate. He always plays computer games until mid-night. He falls behind with his
First, quit smoking. Quit smoking is tough for me. However,

lessons. My body, which becomes accustomed to having nicotine in it, so it is time to getting out of bad habits. Third, eat a balanced diet. Experts say there are three groups of food, energygiving food, body-building food and protective food. Experts say a balanced diet is consist of these three kinds of food. Experts also say they can help us work and play all day. They can also make strong bones and muscles. Nevertheless, I like

Although it is difficult to eat vegetables, I will try.
nothing but beef, fish. Trust me, grandpa! I’ll succeed! Best wishes! yours, James

Smoking is bad for health.

does harm to
1.do (terrible) harm to/ be harmful to/ do (terrible) damage to/ have a great effect on代替be bad for

When I want to smoke a cigarette, I Every time feel like should remind myself that I’m a nonsmoker. 2.every time/ each time/ whenever代替 when, feel like doing代替want to do

He always plays computer games until midnight. is addicted to

Addicted to surfing the Internet, he falls behind with his lessons. 3.be addicted to / addict oneself to 表沉 溺于,沉迷于,对......上瘾

Although it is difficult to eat vegetables, I will try. In spite of the difficulty eating vegetables, I will try. 4.in spite of/ despite/ regardless of 代替 although

What makes a good essay?

Is it without mistake? (spelling, grammar)

Is there any advanced vocabulary(高级词汇)? Language Is there any good sentence pattern(句式)?
Does the writer use any linking word?

Good Sentence Patterns

Dear grandpa, After reading your letter, I have made up my mind to quit smoking and lead a healthy life just like you live. I will follow three steps to live a healthy life. First, quit smoking. Quit smoking is tough for me. However, smoking is bad for health, I am determined to give it up. When I want to smoke a cigarette, I should remind myself that I’m a non-smoker. Second, break bad habits. I have a classmate. He always plays computer games until mid-night. He falls behind with his lessons. My body, which becomes accustomed to having nicotine in it, so it is time to getting out of bad habits. Third, eat a balanced diet. Experts say there are three groups of food, energy-giving food, body-building food and protective food. Experts say a balanced diet is consist of these three kinds of food. Experts also say they can help us work and play all day. They can also make strong bones and muscles. Nevertheless, I like nothing but beef, fish. Although, it is difficult to eat vegetables, I will try. Trust me, grandpa! I’ll succeed! Best wishes! yours, James

__

常用句型结构: 1.倒装结构 2.it句型(强调句,it作形式主语,宾语等) 3.从句 (定语从句,主语从句等)

What sentence pattern is used? 1.Tough as it is, with great efforts and determination, I will succeed.(林青青) 2.Only when you get out of unbearable stress and strain can you enjoy life.( 董晓 宜) 3.It’s time that I got rid of bad habits to keep fit physically and mentally. ( 赵妃妃) 4.What I definitely believe is that I will live as long and healthy a life if I follow your advice.(王薇薇)

_____ _ _ _____ _________

Polish

Dear grandpa, After reading your letter, I have made up my mind to quit smoking and lead a healthy life just like you live. I will follow three steps to live a healthy life. First, quit smoking. Quit smoking is tough for me. However, smoking is bad for health, I am determined to give it up. When I want to smoke a cigarette, I should remind myself that I’m a non-smoker. Second, break bad habits. I have a classmate. He always plays computer games until mid-night. He falls behind with his lessons. My body, which becomes accustomed to having nicotine in it, so it is time to getting out of bad habits. Third, eat a balanced diet. Experts say there are three groups of food, energy-giving food, body-building food and protective food. Experts say a balanced diet is consist of these three kinds of food. Experts also say they can help us work and play all day. They can also make strong bones and muscles. Nevertheless, I like nothing but beef, fish. Although, it is difficult to eat vegetables, I will try. Trust me, grandpa! I’ll succeed! Best wishes! yours, James

活用多种句型按要求改写一下片段
Quitting smoking is tough for me. However, smoking does harm to health. I am determined to give it up. (合并为一个句子) Experts say there are three groups of food, energy-giving food, body-building food and protective food. Experts say a balanced diet is consist of these three kinds of food. Experts also say they can help us work and play all day. They can also make strong bones and muscles.(用多种句型替换experts say...)

活用多种句型按要求改写一下片段
Quitting smoking is tough for me. However, smoking does harm to health. I am determined to give it up. (合并为一个句子) Tough as it is, I am determined to give up smoking due to its harmful effects.

活用多种句型按要求改写一下片段

Experts say there are three groups of food, energy-giving food, body-building food and protective food. Experts say a balanced diet consists of these three kinds of food. Experts also say they can help us work and play all day They can also make strong bones and muscles.(用多种句型替换experts say...) As is reported by experts , a balanced diet consists of energy-giving, body-building and protective food. Not only can the three kinds of food help us work and play all day but also they can make strong bones and muscles.

Content Are all the points stated? Are all the points to the point?(切题)

Content

Dear grandpa, After reading your letter, I have made up my mind to quit smoking and lead a healthy life just like you live. I will follow three steps to live a healthy life. First, quit smoking. Quit smoking is tough for me. However, smoking is bad for health, I am determined to give it up. When I want to smoke a cigarette, I should remind myself that I’m a non-smoker. Second, break bad habits. I have a classmate. He always plays computer games until mid-night. He falls behind with his lessons. My body, which becomes accustomed to having nicotine in it, so it is time to getting out of bad habits. Third, eat a balanced diet. Experts say there are three groups of food, energy-giving food, body-building food and protective food. Experts say a balanced diet is consist of these three kinds of food. Experts also say they can help us work and play all day. They can also make strong bones and muscles. Nevertheless, I like nothing but beef, fish. Although, it is difficult to eat vegetables, I will try. Trust me, grandpa! I’ll succeed! Best wishes! yours, James

Writing Assessment
paragraphs Structure Language Writing

topic sentences without mistakes advanced vocabulary
sentence patterns

Content

points
to the point


更多相关文档:

选修6 Unit3 A healthy life写作教学设计

语文学科学情分析 小学语文教学目标设计的... 北师大...写作教学设计 选修 6 Unit3 A healthy life 写作...How to live a healthy life? Use your ...

unit3 a healthy life

unit3 a healthy life_高二英语_英语_高中教育_...通过听和读的输入,在内容和结构上为写作的输出做好...二.学情分析 教学对象为高中二年级学生,这两个班...

Unit 3 A Healthy Life

Unit 3 A Healthy Life_英语_高中教育_教育专区。...addicted to cigarettes and how they can quit ...Encourage the students to live a healthy life. ...

Unit3 A Healthy Life Using language 公开课教案

Unit3 A Healthy Life Using language 公开课教案_...how to protect themselves from AIDS *talk about ...2014年互联网金融投资行业分析报告文档贡献者 virgil琦...

Unit 3 A healthy life

教材分析 本单元以 A healthy life 为话题,通过谈论人们最关心的健康问题,使...3. Learning ability goals 学能目标 Enable the Ss to learn how to give ...

Unit 3 A healthy life 教案

Unit 3 A healthy life 教案_英语_初中教育_教育...(教材分析) This is the first teaching period ...为写作铺垫 能力培养 更深入思考 细节写作练习 Skimming...

Unit3 A Healthy Life

Unit3 A Healthy Life_英语_高中教育_教育专区。Unit...about some ___on how to ___ Main idea:___...2014造价工程师案例分析... 2014造价工程师造价管理...

Unit3 A healthy life

Unit3 A healthy life 本单元以健康话题为主题,听说...3. Enable the Ss to learn how to give advice...life must be due to the healthy life I live....

How to Live a Healthy Life

How to Live a Healthy Life_英语学习_外语学习_教育...3, Change the bad behavior Smoking and long-...创意简历模板汇集 推理型题分析与总结文档贡献者 天蝎...

Unit 3 A healthy life 教案

Unit 3 A healthy life 教案_英语_高中教育_教育专区...life I live 2...I became addicted to ...five minutes How much money is due to be paid...
更多相关标签:
live a healthy life | 议论文写作讲评 张 | healthy life | a healthy life | healthy life英语作文 | healthy life 作文 | unit3 a healthy life | a healthy life课件 |
网站地图

文档资料共享网 nexoncn.com copyright ©right 2010-2020。
文档资料共享网内容来自网络,如有侵犯请联系客服。email:zhit325@126.com