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英语话剧之泰坦尼克号Titanic后现代搞笑版


旁白: a cold evening. The Titanic has sunken. Rose, Jack and Oscar are on the life It’s boat floating in the ocean. This is Jack. This is Rose and this is Oscar, her husband-tobe.(边说边介绍,三人坐在课桌上) Oscar: Oh, honey~ Are you OK? (边说边将手搭上 Rose 肩) Jack: She is my girl.(打开 Oscar 的手) Oscar: You are so cold.(脱下报纸披在 R 身上面向观众)what you wear, what you are. Jack: What are you doing! (扔掉校服,脱下自己的羽绒服抖了抖,面向观众)BoSideng (波斯登), warm and comfortable, it’s my choice.(将羽绒服披在 Rose 身上) Rose:(向 Jack)I love you.(向观众)But I love BoSideng more. Oscar: Hey! She is my wife-to-be, who are you? Jack: I am I. Wo de di pan wo zuo zhu(我的地盘我做主). Oscar: People on the Earth all know, She, and I, will go to New York to have our we dding.

Rose: But now……

Jack: Don’t say any more! Take your knife out! (从口袋里掏出铅笔,紧握手中) Oscar: Ok. Let’s go fighting! (同样掏出铅笔紧握手中) Jack & Oscar: Fighting! (用铅笔互戳)----小蜜蜂~ Rose: No, no, no! Please stop! (拉二人)( J & O 不小心将 Rose 推下桌子——落水) Rose: Help, help!(Jack & Oscar 将拉上 Rose 桌子) Oscar: Honey, how are you? Rose:(向观众)PiaoRou(飘柔), just so confident~(甩头发) (Rose 不小心推 Oscar,Oscar 落水)

Oscar: Help, help!

Rose: Oh, no! (向 Oscar 伸手)(Jack 抓过 Rose 的手,对视) Jack:(唱)你是我的玫瑰,你是我的花…You are my life, you are my honey~ Rose: But……what about Oscar? Jack: Don’t pay attention to him. Rose: OK. Darling~ I love you, loving you, like mouse love rice~ 旁白:At this time, Oscar has been far away……Jack and Rose are still floating in the ocean. It’s colder and colder. Jack: Do you feel cold? Rose: Yes. You see we are so lonely. Jack: Don’t worry. I have this! (从口袋里掏出打火机,并向观众展示)This is a magic DaHuoji(打火机).(Jack 按下打火机)(Superwoman 上,胸前贴一张纸,上书 S) Superwoman:(向观众)Do you know who am I? I am Superwoman! The famous Super man is my brother. I’m willing to help others. Rose: Would you please help us get away from here?(Superwoman 无视,面向 Jack) Superwoman: Oh, pretty boy~ Come here, I will save you. Jack: Take my girl together. Superwoman: No way!(Superwoman 下)(Jack 第二次按下打火机) (Indian Princess 上,向观众合掌问候) Princess: I am a princess from India. Rose: Would you please help us get away from here? Princess: OK. I have a magic blanket, maybe it can take you away. Come on.(从口袋 里掏出围巾)(Jack & Rose 尝试伸出脚,Princess 上下晃动围巾)

Princess: Oh, no, it’s broken! My blanket! (边说边后退,渐远) (Indian Princess 下)(Jack 第三次还没按,Harry Potter 上,提着扫帚) Harry: Yi? Where am I? (向观众)My name is Harry Potter. I’m from Hogwarts(霍格 沃茨). I lose my way. Rose: Would you please help us get away from here? Harry: I really want to help you, but my ability is limited.(耸肩) Jack:(愤怒地)Oh, my god! Go away at once! (指向前方)(Harry Potter 下) 旁白:Suddenly, the life boat is shaking because Jack and Rose are too heavy. Jack: Rose, listen to me. I love you, but I will leave you.The boat can’t support us for a long time. You must live, so I will jump into the sea. Rose: No, no, no. Jump or not jump, this is a question. Jack: Then let the God decide it(二人低头虔诚祈祷状) Rose: God will bless us.(Jack 和 Rose 同时从身后伸出手来,包剪锤) Jack & Rose: One two three!(Jack 出锤子,Rose 出包子) Jack: I lose. You see, it’s God’s choice.(Rose 连连摇头) Rose: Oh, no. Jack, Jack, why your name is Jack! Jack: I wish you a happy life. Good-bye!(Jack 跳下桌子,Rose 伸手拉,未果) Rose: You jump, I jump.(Rose 跳下桌子,O 未死, 继续叫救命……)
(旁白唱 my heart will go on,音乐起,全剧终。Jack & Rose 跳舞,张开手臂经典动作作结。).


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